What to Do When Saying No at Work Doesn’t Work

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overwhelmed at work

When “No” Doesn’t Change Anything

A reader I’ll call Kate recently asked me an important question that I think many high performers quietly struggle with.

Kate had been feeling increasingly overwhelmed at work. Over the last six months, her responsibilities had grown significantly. She had taken on more projects, more coordination work, more decision-making, and more “small” tasks that often accumulate around strong performers because people trust them to get things done. ...  read more

A Mother’s Love Shapes Us More Than We Realize

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I Didn’t Fully Understand It Until I Became a Mother Myself

As Mother’s Day approaches, I’ve been thinking a lot about my mom and how much her love shaped me over the course of my life.

When I was younger, I don’t think I fully appreciated it.  Like many children, I think I simply assumed my mom would always be there — supporting me, worrying about me, comforting me, encouraging me, and loving me quietly in the background of my life. ...  read more

The Four Myths of Financial Wealth I Didn’t See Coming

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Of all the five types of wealth, Financial Wealth was the one I avoided writing about the longest.  At first, I told myself it was because I didn’t want to sound braggy. Who wants to hear someone talk about financial wealth when so many people are still working hard to build it? But the truth is, I also hesitated because I’m not sure I understand this one as well as I thought I did. ...  read more

A Leadership Lesson in Agency for Managers in a New Job

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What should a manager do when they believe an employee’s performance rating was unfair? This leadership dilemma happens more often than people admit, and how a manager responds can either build trust or quietly weaken their leadership.

“Honestly, I think it was unfair to him.”

That’s how a manager I’ll call Roger started a coaching conversation with me recently. ...  read more

The Unexpected Identity Crisis After Financial Freedom

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identity crisis after financial freedom

I didn’t expect this.

For 30 years, my life had structure — goals, promotions, deadlines, problems to solve, and a ladder to climb. Even when it was stressful, it was familiar. I knew who I was in that world. Then I stepped away.

Financially, we’re okay. We’ve been frugal. We’ve diversified. Even with market downturns, I’m not lying awake worried about money. And yet… I’m lying awake. At 5:00 a.m., grinding my teeth for the first time in ten years, my body burning like a furnace (thank you, perimenopause), covers on, covers off, sometimes moving to the leather couch just to cool down. ...  read more

I Thought I Was a Good Coach. I Was Wrong.

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coaching blind spots

For 15+ years, I’ve been writing this blog and coaching people in my free time. I genuinely believed I knew quite a bit about coaching.  After all, I had 30 years of executive experience. I had navigated high-stakes corporate environments. I had mentored dozens of professionals. I had given advice that people told me changed their lives. ...  read more