Are You Overworking? 4 Tips on How to Stop

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If you are overworking, you are not alone.  Here are some statistics on how hard Americans work today (see detailed infographics at the end of this post):

  • Over 75% of Americans work more than 40 hours a week, and about 10 million Americans work more than 60 hours a week.
  • 10% of worker take work home every other day, and 24% of workers think about work at home or at social events.
  • 1 in 3 American adults don’t take their vacation days.

Being overworked comes at a price to the employee and the company they work for – increased chances of disease, less time with family, disturbed sleep, more stress, and less productivity. ...  read more

7 Steps to Effective Interpersonal Communication

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improve interpersonal communication

Anyone can master interpersonal communication.  There are few people who are naturally good at it. For most people, it takes conscious effort and practice to master this skill. Here are 7 steps to achieve effective interpersonal communication at work — today!

  1. Start with self awareness – Do you know how well you communicate right now? What works and what doesn’t? If you don’t know, gather feedback so you can know your strengths and weaknesses. Use the rest of this list to help with your self-assessment.
  2. Always keep the other person in mind–  For any instance of interpersonal communication, plan out your approach ahead of time. Start with the other person in mind — Try your best to put yourself in their shoes and figure out what might be their mindset, sensitivities, and how they may receive your words. Effective interpersonal communication can only happen if you understand where the other person may stand.
  3. Determine your desired “win-win” outcome:  The outcome of any conversation must be a “win-win,” as not all outcomes you desire are good for the relationship. For example, you may want to prove that you are right, but that would mean the other person needs to be proven wrong. You may win the argument, but lose the relationship. That’s not a good outcome.
  4. Gather the facts:  While facts can’t be the only focus of your conversation, you need the facts to keep the discussion as unbiased as possible. It’s hard to resolve anything if all you have is “he said she said.”
  5. Practice a calm approach/tone:  This will require the most time, especially if you are emotional about the situation. You need to calm down first, and then communicate with an open tone. This requires time, since our instinctive reaction is to take a defensive or offensive tone. An open tone can be one that gives the benefit of the doubt, or focuses on “we” instead of “you vs. me.” Your openness and calmness will invite the other people to listen, and your tone will show that you are there to build the relationship.
  6. Listen as much as you speak:  Effective interpersonal communication is a two way street.  You should spend 50% of the conversation listening. We are sometimes prepared so much that all we focus on is talking. You can lose the listener quickly that way. Pause after a few sentences so the other party can respond. That way you can adapt your communication based on how they react. Sometimes it takes fewer words than you think to achieve the “win-win” outcome.
  7. Don’t expect anything: We cannot control or change anyone else. This is an easy concept that is easy to forget. After all this work we put into structuring an interpersonal communication, there is no guarantee about how the other person will react. Everyone is responsible for their own actions. All you can do is play your part the best you can, accept whatever you get, and adapt your actions from there.
At the end of the day, the key to effective interpersonal communication comes down to practice. We interact with people every day. Some interactions can go well, while others may not. That’s part of the process. As long as you put conscious effort into improving, you will become effective at interpersonal communication over time. For more on this topic, and how to improve your communication skills at work, sign up for my Career Success Newsletter – How to Succeed Like an Executive, where you’ll find insights not published on this blog to accelerate your success. Email Address

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How to Network – Party More

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I am not joking. I will prove it to you why “partying more” will help you with networking.  I went to a Deloitte Consulting alumni event last week and had a blast. I met up with so many old friends, had fun, and discussed quite a bit of business at the same time.

I worked for Deloitte for 10 years but still was pleasantly surprised to see I knew half of the alumni at the event. Some are now Senior Managers and Partners at Deloitte and others are senior executives or successful owners of their own business.  The funny thing was as I was talking to people and recounting old times, I realized I never worked with 95% of the people I knew.  Instead we discussed the good old days of lavish consulting retreats, late night illegal golf cart rides, and dancing up a storm at the annual Christmas parties. ...  read more

What is Interpersonal Communication – Definition and 3 Myths

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Effective interpersonal communication at work is essential to your career success. Yet it’s often not clearly understood nor easy to improve. After researching on Google regarding how others discuss interpersonal communication, I will offer my own perspective – a detailed definition of what is interpersonal communication and 3 most common myths about interpersonal communication. ...  read more

Recently Launched – 3 New Features + Free Coaching Idea

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Thank you for your continuing interest and support.  I am excited that over 5000 unique visitors from 100+ countries have checked out this blog in the last 30 days.  Please pass this blog along to anyone that may find it helpful.  I am pleased to announce 3 new features to further help you use this site and my knowledge. ...  read more

Job Application Email – 4 Tips to Stand out

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Sending a job application email can be tricky.  Recruiters and hiring managers receive hundreds of emails a day.  How can you stand out in your email?   Here are four tips you can use to attract the right attention to your job application email.

  1. Meaningful Subject Line – If the subject line reads “Position Title + Years of Experience + Industry Experience + Education”, the receiver may be more interested in opening and reading it especially if it’s impressive. For Example “Application for Product Manager + 10 year of experience + Stanford EE, Wharton MBA.”  Focus on 6 -10 words that highlights your best qualifications.  This kind of subject line will attract attention and encourage the email receiver to open your job application email as soon as possible.
  2. Warm Referral – The best opening line in an email would be “persona X recommended that I contact you regarding this position.” This mean the receiver knows person X and that person is implicitly endorsing you for this position. So before you send in a job application email, see if you can find a warm connection to that company or hiring manager. A warm introduction is still the best way to apply to a job
  3. List 4 to 5 bullets why you are a good candidate – In the email, don’t just say I am applying to position X and attached is my resume. Summarize why they should care and get a jump on looking at your attached resume. It’s a like a shorten version of a cover letter (no need to also attach a cover letter).  The best way is to use bullets as people can read it faster and keep it short (1-2 sentences each) describing why you think you are a great fit for this job.  Look at the job description and use their terminology or synonyms to cover all the areas where you have experience.
  4. Call to follow up – email is not always reliable.  You could end up in the spam folder or overlooked just because the receiver is swamped.  If you don’t hear anything in a week, call to follow up to see the status of your job application.

If you do these 4 things for your job application email, at least you know you did everything you can to stand out. The rest is up to circumstance and timing. For more job search tips, see my other 60+ articles on job search.  I have articles for how to find job, how to write a resume, interview tips, networking tips, and salary negotiations. Best wishes on your job search.  I am always in your corner. ...  read more

Career Success – How to Succeed like an Executive

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There are five types of job skills essential to career success.

  1. Hard skills – These are trade skills (like programming, accounting, finance, chemistry) that you need to perform your job.
  2. People skills – There are 20 soft skills (including communication skills, interpersonal skills) you should develop on how to best work and interact with others so you can influence their perception of you, your work and motivate their actions.
  3. Self management skills – There are eight soft skills (including patience, stress management) you need to manage how you perceive yourself and how you react to adverse situations
  4. Work Attitude – Establish positive work attitude (such as hard working, loyal, willing to learn) that is typically valued by companies
  5. Professionalism – Practice the basic etiquette of business in the way you dress, speak, and act
After working 15 years in corporate america with a Stanford bachelors degree and a Wharton MBA, I realized that good schooling could only take me so far.  The secret to succeeding like an executive (VP level and above) in any corporation is actually mastering soft skills (20 People Skills and 8 Self Management skills).  Here is why
  • Soft skills are the most difficult to master and will separate you from the mass. Almost anyone can learn basic Professionalism and the necessary Work Attitude that are fundamental to career success.
  • As for hard skills, many schools have rigorous programs regarding how to develop specific hard skills.  As long as you are smart and can study hard, you can master the hard skills.   Soft skills, on the other hand, are not taught well in school and require dedicated effort and practice while working to develop.
  • Soft skills is what will get you promoted to executive level (VP and above).  If you look at any executives you admire today, I would bet that the reasons they advanced to that level is heavily due to their leadership skills, communication skills, or ability to inspire action and deliver results – all soft skills. You can find many engineers with great hard skills that have had difficulty achieving executive level due to lack of soft skills.

If you want to achieve career success and executive level status in any corporation, then it’s important to develop your soft skills.  You can read books and take training; you can learn from your mentors; you can practice at work every day to develop these skills.  I can also help. ...  read more