My Biggest Lessons Learned this Year

Happy Holidays!   Thank you for your interest and support of this blog.   I appreciate every email, comments, questions I got this year.  Whether it’s a thankful email or constructive criticism, I value them all.  Thank you for taking the time to engage with this site and with me.

I hope you are taking some time to enjoy this holiday season with your friends and family.    December is the best time to reflect on this entire year

• What did I learn?
• What have I accomplished?
• What am I thankful for?
• What do I want to do next year?

This year had many up and downs for me.

• I almost quite my job in March.   I was tired of working for two bosses that were not inspiring leaders.
• Luckily I found a new opportunity just in time and switched roles in April.
• Ramp up on the new job was bumpy and took six months.  Initially my business partners didn’t quite see me as a partner.  I had to earn it as well as let go of what I cannot control.
• Near the end of the year, I was finally finding balance in my work and life to enjoy both again.

Throughout this whole journey, there was one constant learning that inspired me – being grateful no matter what.   This is not a new concept but practicing it while I was stressed or down was not easy.  We are all top performers when we feel appreciated, knowledgeable and impactful.  But when we are in a difficult situation, that’s when all of our soft skills are being challenged.   In difficult situations,

• We don’t feel as confident
• We don’t communicate as effectively
• We are unproductively stressed
• We are quick to criticize ourselves and others

This is where I found being grateful helped me throughout the year to get back to balance again

• It helped stopped me from always thinking / stressing about work
• It helped me get out of a two months negative thought pattern
• It helped me be happier in general

When in doubt, see how you can practice gratitude to help you at work and in life.  For this year, here is what I am grateful for.

• I am grateful to my kids for constantly inspiring me to try new things.  They are the ultimate champions of the “growth mindset”  My younger daughter Alexis wanted to learn how to hola hoop.  She literally practiced 100 times a day, without being dampered by her initial lack of success.  Even after getting a bruise on her side from too much practice, she didn’t stop.  First video was on her first day and the second video was two weeks later.
  
  She is teaching me it’s okay to not succeed initially.  If we truly want to learn it, anything can be learned with practice.
• I am grateful for my husband from two aspects
  1. For always encouraging me to pursue my passion – this blog.   Being overly critical with myself, I thought about giving up several time as I was frustrated I was not adding enough services for members and writing enough articles.  He reminds me to be thanksful of the things I can do in the time I have.
  2. For stopping me from dwelling in my complaints.   He is a good listener but after repeating my complaints about work repeatedly, he also exercises “tough love.”  It’s not easy to hear but he is right.  “Just do something about it.  Any action will create new opportunities.”
• I am grateful to all the avid members and readers of this blog.  Your emails of encouragement and feedback on how I can improve is what keeps me going.  Thank you for letting me know how my articles or coaching call helped you make a different decision or navigate a difficult situation at work.  That always makes my day.  Thank you also for making suggestions around new topics I should address.  That helps me write what is relevant to help you.
• I am grateful to my new leader at work.  After switching job, I was not sure my new leader would be any better even with all the rave reviews from colleagues.  I guess I was jaded as my old leaders also seemed to care when I first started.   Over the last 8 months, I truly saw the difference between a boss vs. a leader.  I am thankful to her for teaching me what exemplary, caring leadership can look like., for supporting my growth and for trusting my abilities.  I probably have one of the best leaders in the last 20 years of my career.
• I am grateful for me.  I know this sounds weird, but as an overachiever, I am quick to criticize myself vs. appreciating what I have done.   That’s what can threw me into unnecessary stress and negative thought patterns.   Even with all my pedigree degree and experience, I am just learning now that “I am enough.   Whatever I cannot do, can be done tomorrow.  What is important is maintaining that drive to evolve, learn, and try new things regardless of results.” 🙂

I wish you a very happy new year.  Talk to you in 2017.

Your comments:  What are you grateful for this year?  I would love to hear from you.

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I am always in your corner.

Lei

p.s: I wanted to include my favorite photo of the year.  This was taken in China with my older daughter Isabel and my cousin/his kids.   I love the silliness and energy of this photo.  I learning to play more and more as I get older.  I hope you will too.