Many readers have emailed me or commented on the blog to ask how they can build their confidence, since confidence is essential to career success. I want to share this story I heard on Monday to see if it can help.
After each Yoga class, my favorite teacher, Ryan (female), talks to us about how Yoga can change our health and our lives. This Monday, it was a little different. Instead, she told us this story:
“I have a neighbor who has been in a wheel chair for 10+ years. She cannot feel her legs or feet. After I came back from vacation {Ryan went to Australia for six weeks} last week, I was getting my mail and bumped into my neighbor again. This time she was walking to get the mail! I thought she must have had some miracle surgery while I was away.
“So I asked her – “April, what happened? You are walking! That’s awesome!” This is what she told me: She knew she would never feel her legs and feet again, but she could feel her hips. For the last 10+ years, she has been training herself to slowly extend her nerve sensitivity in her hips to control her legs. She finally could do it enough to try to walk a few weeks ago.
“Since I have been back, I have seen April walking around like a toddler – someone who is learning to walk for the first time, and is getting better at it everyday. It’s a miracle, yet it’s something we are all capable of if we believe in ourselves. So, whether you think you can or cannot, you are right. Why not choose to think of all the ways that you can?”
This story floored me. It reminds me, and hopefully is showing you, that our mind is a powerful tool. We can all establish self confidence to do amazing things!
Our brain is trained to prove ourselves right. If you are constantly telling yourself that you can’t, that you aren’t good enough, that you don’t know how to do it well, or believe others when they say this, you will prove yourself right. That lack of confidence in your internal dialogue is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
So, how do you build self confidence? It must start with how you choose to think of yourself no matter what others say. I am sure no one expected April to walk again, or even told her that she would walk again. On the contrary, I am sure that everyone expected her to stay in her wheel chair. However, her will and her confidence in herself and the human body was stronger. She didn’t expect to walk again, but she was going to give it all she had. That’s the spirit we all need in our lives and work!
So, the next time you are thinking that you can’t do something, tell those thoughts to shut up and go elsewhere. Start telling yourself that you can, and try your hardest. Surround yourself with supporters, those who can build your self confidence and self esteem, instead of people who criticize you to build their own ego. With practice in thought and action, you will be amazed at what you can achieve and how you can feel about yourself.
Your comments: What is your reaction to this story? What methods are you using to build your confidence? I look forward to your comments below.
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Best wishes to your career. I am always in your corner!
Lei
I totally agree with the principle . You should never give up when negative thoughts overwhelm you and in the majority of cases you will win. This is my personal experience with a number of very difficult situations I have faced in life.